so here we are! a few days away from going to spain aaaand I feel oddly terrified. well, terrified's quite the strong word, I'd say more in a funk. I think I had just assumed that the week before shipping off to the granada airport I would hardly be able to contain my excitement. I'd be listening to spanish music, I'd have been diligently practicing my verb conjugations, checking out pictures of Seville's Rio de Janiero (and not have to have googled the name for this post), maybe even gone as far as wearing a flamenco dress around the apartment. who the hell knows!
but no. instead I've been feelin' all fevery for the past week and whenever I inhale through my nose I sound like my 94 yr old grandmother. just really pretty stuff.
but after talking to a few wise friends and my dad it seems like what might be going on is something of a self induced illness. the mind is most definitely powerful and maybe it thinks it's doing me some service by making me feel death-bed enough to not go to spain since I feel so scared about going. this probably makes sense as the doctor said she didn't even know what was wrong with me.
so I think the best thing to do is handle this self-induced sickness with a self-medication... and no sillies I'm not talking about crack.. I'm talking about psyching myself up by doing the things I expected would come naturally to me in the first place. researching spain, reviewing the language, thinking about how awesome the experience will be...but maybe not so much the flamenco dress. yet. aaaand for the sickness I have been saturating myself with hot drinks made from lemon, ginger, apples, echinacea, green tea, vitamin c and zinc. woo hoo! hopefully when I become a hippie teacher I'll be drinkin this shit on a normal basis.
So, whilst on the positive note of travel, I shall leave whoever will read this with a few awesome inspirational quotations:
“There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign.” – Robert Louis Stevenson
“People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D. Runes
“When we get out of the glass bottle of our ego and when we escape like the squirrels in the cage of our personality and get into the forest again, we shall shiver with cold and fright. But things will happen to us so that we don’t know ourselves. Cool, unlying life will rush in.” – D. H. Lawrence
“All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware.” – Martin Buber
“Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living.” – Miriam Beard
“Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember, and remember more than I have seen.” – Benjamin Disraeli
“Wandering re-establishes the original harmony which once existed between man and the universe” - Anatole France